Stranger Danger

Ye Qing examined his surroundings for a bit before letting out a sigh of relief. The old man’s whole body seemed to be made up of corpse wax, and he seemed to possess the ability to regenerate himself no matter how many times it was destroyed. Strangers like these were the absolute worst. The only real way to kill him was to annihilate him utterly in one go.

Had he not concentrated his fist force and tried to destroy the old man from the outside, there was a high chance he would just be wasting his energy. That was why he had condensed his force into a ball, inserted it into the old man’s body, and destroyed him from the inside out. Only then could he annihilate every speck of the Stranger.

“Wha… What just happened? Master is dead! Master is dead!”

“Killed! Killed! The human killed Master! What do we do now?”

“We need to run! We need to run as far away as we can!”

“But we don’t have legs. How can we possibly outrun him?”

“We need a plan, we need a plan n—he’s looking at us! He’s walking toward us! Oh shit, oh shit, it’s all over, we’re all gonna die!”

The iron pot, stove, rice jar and more Strangers were all panicking after the death of their master. Just when it looked like they were going to submit to their fate, the carrying pole leaning against the wall said, “I have a plan. Flour, I want you to blind that human when he comes close. Rice, I want you to slip under his feet while he’s blinded and trip him.”

“While he’s disoriented, we’ll rush him together. Rolling Pin, I want you to smash his head in. Knife, I want you to cut his neck. Rice Jar will smash his legs, Iron Pot will spill him with boiling water, and Stove will burn him with its flames. We’ll give him the ice-and-fire treatment…”

Ye Qing: “...”

Are they stupid? They’re not even trying to lower their voice. Had I suddenly lost all of my powers or something, or are they just that arrogant?

Ye Qing didn’t inform the Strangers that he was aware of their plan, of course. Instead, he slowly walked toward them exactly as they wanted. When he was about a meter away from the stall, he closed his eyes just in time to avoid being blinded by a shower of flour. At the same time, an army of rice rolled up to his feet and tried to trip him over.

“Let’s fuck him up, everyone! Ahhhhh…”

As soon as Flour covered his face, Rolling Pin, Rice Jar, Knife and the rest of the Strangers let out a battle cry and charged toward Ye Qing like gangsters.

“Heh! Never thought I’d be swarmed by a bunch of food and kitchen equipment pretending to be gangsters one day!” Ye Qing smirked as he emitted a layer of astral qi to protect his body. Flour was immediately pushed out and away from Ye Qing. Then, he exerted a bit of strength and crushed the rice that had rolled under his feet.

Next, he grabbed Rolling Pin before the Stranger could smack him in the back of his head and swung it at Knife. Caught completely off guard, Knife was knocked right into a wall.

Not done yet, he swung Rolling Pin and sent Rice Jar flying before it could smash into his legs. Unable to arrest its momentum, it slammed into both Iron Pot and Stove and experienced the so-called ice-and-fire treatment.

“Argh! My back!”

“It hurts so much…”

“What the hell do you think you were doing, Iron Pot, Stove? Are you trying to kill us [1]!?”

“You’re the idiot who slammed into us! What else are we supposed to do?”

……

While the Strangers were busy picking themselves up, Ye Qing sucked in a deep breath and took two steps forward. Like a raging torrent, he threw out a third punch.

“Cloud Vaporization Style”

A tsunami of Burning Wind washed over the entire space. By the time the Strangers realized what just happened, they were already burning to death.

“Wah! Wah! I’m burning alive! I need you to splash me with water now, Iron Pot!”

“What water? My water is long gone, you doofus! Can’t you see that I’m red hot right now?”

“You guys think you had it bad? Look at me! I’m a stove, and I’m melting because the fire’s too hot! Who would even believe this?”

“Ayayayayaa…”

The Strangers never stopped bickering until the end. Their voices grew weaker and weaker until finally, they were all gone.

“They were an interesting bunch. I would have kept them alive if I didn\'t need to make up for the dragon-serpent runes I lost,” sighed Ye Qing while withdrawing his fist. Every single one of these Strangers was a Malice-class Stranger, and in the past they would’ve posed a huge problem. But now? They were just fodder for more runes.

It was at this moment Rolling Pin finally woke up from his short coma. It slurred, “Urgh… M-My head is spinning like I’ve been swung around at least a dozen times… D-Did we win, brothers? Is it over?”

Rolling Pin thought its side had won since it couldn’t hear anything. In response, Ye Qing replied smilingly, “It’s over.”

“That’s good—wait a second. You don’t sound right. You… You’re not dead!” Rolling Pin exclaimed in shock. It was only now it realized that Ye Qing had been holding it this whole time. Before it could struggle free, Ye Qing engulfed it in the Netherflame. It was burned down to dust in just the blink of an eye.

“Now it’s finally over.”

Ye Qing clapped his hands and got ready to leave. However, he suddenly realized that his hands were unusually slippery. It was almost as if they were covered in a sheen of oil. When he looked down, he discovered in horror that his hands were covered in a layer of yellowish oil. In fact, it wasn’t just hit hands. He soon realized that his face, his arms, his legs and all other parts of his body were covered in the oil.

“Is this… corpse wax?!”

Ye Qing couldn’t believe it. The smelly, yellowish “oil” looked exactly the same as the old man’s corpse wax. However, the old man should be dead already!

“The corpse wax is leaking from my pores; from inside of me! But how is this possible?”

When Ye Qing tried to wipe one of his arms clean, he quickly realized that more corpse wax was leaking out of his pores. It was like his inside were filled with corpse wax.

“What’s going on? When did this happen?”

For a time, Ye Qing was completely stumped. He just couldn’t figure out when he had been “infected” with corpse wax. He had never made physical contact with the old man or the corpse wax [2], so how did they enter his body?

“Unless… the air?” Ye Qing suddenly looked at the air around him. When he punched the old man so hard that he literally evaporated, he hadn’t actually wiped every trace of him out of existence. To be specific, the old man had left behind a cloud of yellow mist. He hadn’t paid it any attention because you know, it was just mist, but now, he realized that he was dead wrong.

Did the yellow mist turn into corpse wax after I inhaled it into my body? It must be!

It was at this moment Ye Qing noticed that the three customers were undergoing the same changes as him. In fact, their situation was much worse. Like melting candles, they were dripping so much corpse wax that large bodies of corpse wax had pooled underneath their feet. None of them noticed what was happening to them, however. They were still eating their meals with a look of bliss on their faces.

If before their expressions elicited emotions of warmth and harmony, then now it was pure horror and disgust.

The old man must still be alive!

Ye Qing immediately circulated the Burning Wind and burned away all the corpse wax inside his body—or at least, he tried to. The moment he tried to channel his astral qi, he discovered in horror that they were moving at a snail’s pace. It was as if his blood vessels and bodily points were clogged.

Suddenly, the corpse wax covering the scholar wriggled unnaturally. They condensed into a lump behind his shoulders and—

Pop!

The lump popped and revealed a head. It was none other than the old man’s head.

The old man’s head slowly turned around to glare at Ye Qing. Then, his mouth split open as he asked, “Food is the most wonderful thing in this world, so why do you refuse to eat?”

“Why do you refuse to eat?”

“WHy do YOu REfuSe to EAT?!”

More corpse wax poured out of the scholar, the down-to-earth man, and the woman’s body and onto the ground. Then, the corpse wax started spreading toward Ye Qing like a tidal wave.

Ye Qing lifted an eyebrow and tried to retreat, but his own body started secreting more corpse wax. He found himself unable to control his body for an instant—or more accurately, his reflex was a beat slower than it should be—and the flood of corpse wax reached him during that short delay.

The next moment, the corpse wax crawled up his legs and covered his body rapidly. It looked like he could easily pull away from it, but in reality the corpse wax was strong enough to pin him in place and immobilize him. He was completely covered in just the blink of an eye.

More corpse wax were being produced by the second. The three people’s internal organs, flesh, blood and bone were all being melted to produce more corpse wax. It wasn’t long before their insides were completely emptied, and only their skins were left. At the same time, a literal hill of corpse wax was pinning down Ye Qing.

Pop pop pop!

Three heads burst out of the surging corpse wax on Ye Qing’s shoulders and chest. They all wore the old man’s face.

“wHy dO yoU RefuSE TO EAt?”

“WiLl YOu rEalLY nOt EaT?”

“iF YOu won’t eat, THEn I Will EAT YoU!”

The three heads said one after another.

“Pah!”

Ye Qing opened his mouth and spat out Lightning Bolt. White hot lightning instantly annihilated the corpse wax covering his face.

“You know why I don’t want to eat your food. It’s disgusting!”

Ye Qing didn’t understand why the old man was asking such a stupid question again and again. There was no way he didn’t realize just how fucking disgusting it was!

Ye Qing shook a little. His flesh and blood squirmed, and his bones made this popping noise that sounded like thunder. When he unleashed his Dragon Elephant strength, the thick corpse wax enveloping his body was blown away in an instant.

However, the scattered corpse wax quickly reformed itself in the sky, yellowish and smelly and sticky as ever. The way they spread out like a spider’s web while writhing and twisting unto themselves could only be described as pure evil.

Eventually, it happened. The corpse wax fell down toward Ye Qing like a blanket.

While the corpse wax was falling, Ye Qing pulled out a gong and a mallet from his Nature’s Shell. Grinning, he hit the gong with the mallet as hard as he could.

1. Probably because Rice Jar has Rice inside. ☜

2. This might confuse some people, but as he said his first punch didn’t make physical contact. Remember that he can just unleash fist force like a kamehameha, but faster. ☜