The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

[Roland Mist. Strength 32 (+10), Dexterity 22, Constitution 22, Intelligence 30, Will 21, Charisma 19. Racial talents: War Angel, Original Sin Demon Form, Sword of Order, Titan’s Body, Feet of Ethereal Shadow, Divine Child, Chaos Barrier. Basic job classes: Level 60 Order Knight / Level 60 Chaos Lich King / Level 10 Four Elemental Swordcaster. High-level job classes: Level 4 Lord of Frigidwinter.]

[System Evaluation: An excellent meat shield that can take an ancient dragon head-on; a Gold-ranked newcomer that can face any Legend warrior… if you really want to go find a Time Dragon to fight and prove me wrong, that’s fine as well.]

[System Reminder: Congratulations on finding an even more difficult opponent. The two opponents before you are even stronger at melee combat than immemorial dragons. But aren’t you forgetting about something? You’re supposed to be a mage!]

Compared to when I was in the Northlands, my stats didn’t really change much. They were still rather balanced. It was just that my advanced job classes leveled up ever so slightly. Aso’s gift of magical knowledge also helped increase my Will and Intelligence stats by 1 each.

I didn’t really care about Will, as this stat was only important for priests. Nor did I really require a higher Will stat in order to resist the various types of mental magic. Meanwhile, the other stat of Intelligence was the main stat for all mages. It was also relevant to the efficiency and precision of magical research. This one additional point just happened to help me break the barrier of 30 Intelligence—truly wonderful.

This was also my second stat that reached the landmark of 30. However, perhaps I was still missing some condition, as I hadn’t been rewarded with any ability for breaking past 30 Intelligence. Nothing changed in me foundationally.

I really wanted to complain about it, but when I thought about how Harloys’ almost scary 40 Intelligence didn’t even reward her with some powerful ability, I felt much better.

Harloys’ true potential was being dragged down by the magical pet contract. However, there was no excuse for my own power level to not improve. I also knew the reason why progress had been so slow for me recently. After all, I was a sly one who knew how to run away from or avoid any too difficult, too dangerous, or meaningless battles. But, sometimes, it really was better to be a bit stupider.

The main characters of hot-blooded legends were typically hot-blooded idiots. But this wasn’t about ridiculous concepts like idiot’s luck, or being protected by the heavens. It was simply that hot-blooded fools were just like single-celled organisms who would never fear or back down from any challenge. They would never worry about the consequences of losing. The more fights they caused or got involved in, the faster they improved in power level. As long as these types maintained their own original intentions and accumulated a sufficient amount of combat experience, their rate of growth would be akin to cheating… Fine then, I was actually talking about people like Adam. Sometimes, I was truly envious of those who thought about literally nothing every day.

I could faintly perceive that the next breakthrough for me would be incredibly important and also that I had already achieved the foundational conditions necessary for a breakthrough. However, the feeling that I was lacking something lingered.

Every bit of hard work would be rewarded. Even the most excellent gem would need a high amount of polishing before it could brilliantly shine. Perhaps my bloodline possessed limitless strength, but it would require an extremely forceful polishing in order to shine through. Even since I left the Underground World, perhaps only my fight against Emordilorcan counted as a truly difficult one. Recently, I seemed to be having it quite easy in terms of actual, pure combat. But since there were huge battles waiting for me in the future, unless I forced myself to the brink of life and death, how could I possibly help the potential in my body explosively grow?

“I realize that only through many practical battles against similar or higher level opponents will I grow at a fast rate, and that battles with my life on the line are the best of all for training… but isn’t it rather stupid to constantly—and intentionally—fight death battles while forced to the brink?”

Perhaps it was just a fault of my personality. Even though I knew that it was a problem of mine how I always overthought things, I was unable to change the way I was. I simply loved to think everything through. However, as a warrior, thinking everything through wasn’t always a good thing.

“Sometimes, I’m actually envious of people like Adam and Karwenz. They don’t need to worry about anything and simply act based on their own personal preferences. They get to grow more powerful at a cheat-like rate. I calculate so much and work so hard for my resources and support but can barely even keep up with them.”

But there was one part where I was quite similar to those two hot-blooded idiots. If there was a true battle where I was forced to the brink, I would…

“Stand strong and remain courageous!”

I tossed aside the cracked Ice Calamity magic sword. In front of such an opponent, such a fragile sword was already useless.

“Emordilorcan’s Wall of Sighs!”

I covered my arm with the Myth-ranked tower shield I received long ago. The Emordilorcan face sculptured on it appeared to be roaring in anger. This shield didn’t possess any particularly incredible abilities, but it helped my trembling arm regain its steadiness.

[Ability of Emordilorcan’s Wall of Sighs: Immovable Mountain. The wielder of this shield will have their Constitution increased by 2 points. If the wielder also has the SemiGod Equipment Roaring Armlet of the Earth equipped, the wielder can transfer part of any impact received into the earth as long as they are standing on the ground. This also confers immunity to being knocked off balance or off one’s feet.]

This ability seemed nice, but it was an ability purely for taking hits. Nor did this Myth-rank shield possess any ability that an even higher-level defensive equipment would—the ability to reduce physical damage. All impacts I received still hurt like hell, and any blows that landed on a critical location would be able to kill me. In reality, it was a weak ability.

Emordilorcan’s two pieces of equipment even had a set equipment effect that required both pieces of equipment equipped in order to obtain immunity from being knocked over. Plus, the wielder had to have their feet on the ground. It was quite troublesome. But in my current situation, it was the most useful ability available to me.

“Come, let us compete and see who falls first.”

The greatest advantage of my War Angel form would be the ability of flight. However, I was unable to use that right now as I needed the special effects of Emordilorcan’s equipment.

“THIS IS SPARTA! I shall let you all witness my willpower—damn it! Don’t hit my face!” [1] 1

I immediately made an error and received a black eye for it; please pretend you didn’t see that. I heaved a deep breath, observed my enemy’s movements, lowered my head, leaned sideways, sidestepped, and dodged yet another incredibly heavy punch. For those blows which I was unable to dodge, I simply blocked them with my shield, absorbing the impact and mitigating part of the force with the power of the earth as I looked for opportunities to counterattack.

*Clang!*

These tremendous three-meter-tall adamantine magic puppets were emotionless, unhesitant, and unshakeable. Every one of their attacks had the power to fall mountains, with each attack precisely aimed at their opponent. They would have no pity no matter how much blood they shed. They didn’t have any bloodlust, either. They merely attacked and defended at their own pace, acting like perfect machines simply doing their job.

Meanwhile, their opponent was me, a flesh and blood person who seemed to be even harder than adamantine.

My arm broke? I merely gave myself a splint made of ice, numbing my senses, and continued fighting.

My right eye could no longer see anything? Well, I still had my left eye. Oh, my left eye had temporarily gone blind as well? I still had my sharp sensory perceptions.

The tremendous impacts I was receiving heavily injured my internal organs? No problem, I spat out some blood and continued.

“Faster, even faster. This shouldn’t be difficult for me; these are simple machine opponents. Remember my past combat experiences. I’ve met so many opponents far more intelligent than these.”

I could no longer physically see anything, but I could still sense everything that was going on. Those heavy fists attacked in such obvious patterns that I was still able to sense them with my eyes closed.

“Hurry—hurry! The limit of my physical body and energy? Compared to brinks I’ve been forced to in the past, this is nothing!”

Although I was no longer able to even stand steadily, I showed no signs of messing up my actions. Since I was no longer able to increase my speed, all that was left for me to do was to simplify and make my movements as efficient as possible so that the tiniest of motions would give me the greatest results. I stepped forward, leaned slightly, and suddenly jumped backwards. It was enough as long as I successfully dodged the attack.

“Quicker, quicker! I’m no cowardly turtle who knows only to hide and take hits!”

I was gradually getting used to my enemy’s pace. I was able to change from total defense to mixing attacks in while defending. I gradually changed from defending ninety percent of the time to defending only fifty percent of the time. And since I was able to start attacking more often, the Hibernation Chill effect finally started stacking at a faster rate, helping tilt the scales in my favor.

[Hibernation Chill effect: This effect is added on to all of your ice element attacks. Every single ice element attack will slow your enemy by 1%. Stacks additively until 100% upon which your opponent’s time will be eternally frozen. Impossible to resist or to be immune against. The slowing effect will be removed if your opponent hasn’t reached 100% and hasn’t received any damage from you in the past ten minutes.]

As the Hibernation Chill effect continually and additively stacked on the magic puppets, their attacks became slower and slower.

“Faster, faster! I need to at least be faster than these hunks of metal!”

Yep, now things were simply a competition of time and willpower. Would the magic puppets stop moving first, or would I be literally beaten to death?

“Faster, faster!”

I was weakened due to my blood loss. Even though I was able to predict their movements and the fact that their fists had only half their original speed, I no longer had the energy to dodge their attacks. Just as I was expecting my head to be squished like a watermelon in the next moment, something unexpectedly changed.

*Ding!*

It was as if the entire world paused for a moment as something sounded in the air. The next moment, everything returned to normal, yet something was now clearly different. I saw a world dissimilar to before.

[Congratulations for activating the natural talent ability…]

I didn’t have the time to check the System’s notification and the predictable insult for me tacked on to the end. The magic puppets’ adamantine fists were still perilous, and I could only fight back by following my instincts. However, to my astonishment, I discovered that it seemed like their overall speed had dropped, as if…

“…I have a chance at victory! Even faster! Faster!”

Finally, I managed to win by using the last remnants of my strength right before I fainted. Finally, the two magic puppets were almost unable to move, only being able to trudge one centimeter at a time.

All the other battles around Roland had ended as well, with his companions having defeated all the elemental creatures. This fierce battle was only observed by the “duelist’s” companions as he single-handedly took on these two adamantine puppets with only his flesh and blood body. His companions strongly believed that he would finally win in the end, just as always.

And things proved that they were correct—just as always, he did as he promised…

“Ahh, you stinky pervert! Your dirty liquid is entering my body! Ahh, I’m being polluted! It’s so unpleasant, it’s so discomforting, I’m going to break! I’m going to break! Hurry and pull out!”

Harloys’ moaning echoed throughout the room, causing everyone to look at me strangely. It was as if I was doing something incredibly evil or improper.

“Stop distorting things and making everyone misunderstand on purpose! I’m merely using your clones as bandages to stop my blood. Stop making stuff up about my liquids entering your body or whatever!”

“I wasn’t making stuff up at all! Isn’t blood a liquid? It feels incredibly strange to have someone else’s blood flowing in my body! Only you would rip off a piece of someone else’s body to use as a bandage! You’ve gone overboard! You demon!”

“You can produce a limitless number of clones anyways. They’re no different to the lowest-level slimes. Ah, perhaps they can be used in ways other than bandages as well, such as silly cat underwear and—stop biting me! I’ll really die if you cause me to lose any more blood.”

After some more messing around, Harloys ended up with just a pout.

“It seems you obtained what you wanted.”

As I looked at my System’s notification, I indeed obtained a result for my hard work, causing me to tear up—don’t misunderstand now, I wasn’t tearing up in joy. It was because I didn’t know how else to react to this awkwardness.

Did I succeed in making a breakthrough by pushing myself in a life-and-death battle? I did succeed, and the new natural talent ability I acquired as listed by my System was the best proof of this. But…

“Why was it that I made a breakthrough with my Constitution and Dexterity stats? I’m a mage! I was supposed to make a breakthrough with my 30 Intelligence stat!”

“… How were you a mage just now? I thought that it was either a duel between barbarians or a master monk self-inflicting pain upon himself.”

As I recalled my fight just earlier, I was instantly rendered speechless. Indeed, I wasn’t like much of a mage at all just earlier. And even if I received a breakthrough, there was no guarantee that it would be a mage’s breakthrough.

“It was basically a perfect knight’s battle! You’re an absolutely perfect role model for the knightly spirit, with your unyielding will and your impregnable defense! Um… Teacher, what’s the matter?”

Cohen didn’t even notice that he had just spread salt in my wound as he tried to console me upon seeing how disconsolate I was. However, this wasn’t even the worst part.

The battles were now finished, and according to Aso’s original trial, this was apparently supposed to be the end of it, with the two adamantine magic puppets acting as the final bosses. However…

“What? Allow him to be the new tower master? Dream on, didn’t you see that scene just now? How is this guy supposed to be a wise mage in any way? He’s obviously just a brute force monkey who hasn’t even matured yet. I might as well pick a gnome instead. At the very least, a gnome would know to run away from an adamantine magic puppet.”

This mechanical voice belonged to someone who greatly sounded like the mage tower spirit Meteor—it belonged to the other mage tower spirit of this Three-Colored Tower, the tower spirit named Garden. [2] 2

Alright then, I won’t comment about Aso’s strange naming sense. Now, one of the two mage tower spirits in charge of this tower was rejecting the new master, doubtlessly a huge obstacle for me.

Meanwhile, that familiar vicious mage tower spirit, Meteor, was actually defending me.

“No matter what, he successfully completed the trial. According to the rules, he should become the new master, even if he didn’t show any signs of a mage’s Intelligence. He really is more like a barbarian who only knows how to think with his knee. Not only that, he didn’t even detect that these adamantine magic puppets were intentionally designed with a weakness to thunder magic. Any thunder magic attacks against them will be greatly effective. Nor did he discover that the magic puppets had a rune on their backs that gave them the power of movement, which was an intentional design meant to give them a weak spot. Nor did he notice the runes carved onto the path here hinted at the adamantine puppets’ weaknesses… or that underneath the fire elemental pool was a runic spell array that could control the adamantine puppets. Fine then, he really is so unreliable. How about we add an additional test?”

Note:

[1] ED/N: A famous line from a famous movie, as well as… a meme. http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/this-is-sparta.

[2] TL/N: This is a reference to the very popular Japanese manga/television drama named Meteor Garden.