Beware Of Chicken

Book 5: Chapter 28: Closer to Home

I laid in bed for a little, in darkness. Seeing as I couldn’t get back to sleep, instead I decided to take a walk and check in on everyone.

Meimei opened one eye when I got up. I smiled at her and waved her back to sleep. She examined me for a moment, but whatever she saw satisfied her and she closed her eye again, her breathing evening out.

Zhuye was in his crib, sound asleep. I had made it for him as he got more mobile and prone to adventuring. The crib gave him a spot to crawl around safely. I gently opened the door and padded out into the quiet hall. Xiulan’s door was open, so I poked my head in. The woman was bundled up in her blankets, her breaths quiet. She had been training her ass off and helping coordinate all of Vajra’s scouts, so she definitely deserved the rest.

The rest of the rooms on the second floor were empty. Tigu and Yin had decided that the sleepover protocol was in effect. They were in the living room with Delun and the Torrent Rider, sleeping on the thick, puffy futons I had made with Meiling. Tigu was hugging Shaggy Two while snoring softly. Yin had kicked most of her blankets off while Noodle was asleep on her chest. Delun was on his stomach, and the Torrent Rider was in a similar state to Yin.

Gou Ren, Chunky, Peppa, Xianghua, and Bowu were all at their house. Huo Ten was sleeping in his underground passages, and Babe was meditating near the window.

I kept quiet so they would be able to rest and headed to the river room. Washy was already awake as I entered, lounging against the side of the concrete pool that connected our house to the river.

“Having trouble sleeping too, buddy?” I asked him. The dragon blinked, looking a little surprised to see me, before he nodded.

I clapped him on the shoulder. “Tell you what. We’re going to check in with Vajra, then start on breakfast. Give me a hand?”

The dragon hesitated for a moment, before nodding. I grabbed a small jug of maple syrup from the river where it was kept cool and exited my home, a dragon padding along behind me. We headed for the “command center”…and for the one that I knew would be awake. Vajra really didn’t sleep like a human, instead taking minor micro naps that lasted for a minute or two. Benefits of being an insect, I suppose.

It was a small, squat hut, looking just like a giant beehive box, big enough to fit myself and placed at the edge of the river by the house. It had numerous small holes in the roof, and I could see bees coming and going. I opened the latch and walked into the small, cramped room. A fire crystal hung in the center of the room, keeping it warm, and there was a pile of what looked like golden dust on a table. The pile radiated warmth, and the bees would gather it like pollen onto their back legs—Yin’s own contribution in helping the bees. They lasted for about six hours before a bee had to return and be relieved.

“Anything to report, Vajra?” I asked her.

The bee, sitting on a map, danced for a moment and then several bees lifted off their perch to fly just above the map, forming what looked like a dark cloud.

“A storm over there?” I asked, and Vajra bobbed up and down. Other than that, there seemed to be nothing new to report.

“Thank you all for your hard work so far,” I said, addressing her and looking at the other bees. I placed the jar of maple syrup on the table and opened it up. The bees in the room seemed to pause for a moment as I did so. “Share this with all the scouts, okay? Breakfast will be ready in a couple of hours.”

Vajra buzzed happily.

Washy and I exited back into the cold and darkness.

“What do you think, Washy? It\'s the solstice. Something traditional? Or do you think today is a good day for experimentation?”

The dragon perked up slightly at my statement, giving it due consideration…before he decided.

‘Experiment,’ the dragon declared. I considered his words, before nodding. It was cold and we had all been working hard, so a big, hearty breakfast was going to be just the ticket, and I had been wanting to try this for a little while. I had just gotten a tomato sauce for beans that I was happy with.

“Then,it\'s time for the Full Rainy Island,” I declared, and Washy’s eyes sharpened. I gave the dragon instructions on what I needed him to get from the greenhouse—while I went to collect the eggs.

They were no longer placed directly against the house; we had too many chickens for that to be practical now, and as much as I loved them, chicken shit smelled like, well, chicken shit. It wasn’t bad when we didn’t have that many, but we were approaching seventy now. They were all happy, healthy, and showed no signs of any kind of sapience, which was nice—and they provided the several dozen eggs we went through practically daily.

All of us ate heartily, and I always told everyone to eat until they were full. Washy and Chunky could pack away a full dozen each, while Gou Ren, Tigu, Yin, and I could get down four or five. The lightest eaters were Rizzo and Noodle; Rizzo probably had half to a single egg, while Noodle just didn’t eat that much, seeing as he was a snake. Some days he didn’t eat at all, if he had eaten an egg or two the day before.

We were approaching Gaston levels of egg consumption, but hey, they were fresh, tasted delicious, and everybody ate them. So thank you for your valuable service, girls. I made sure to hand out scritches to the ladies… and Xiao Ku the rooster. The little man hopped up onto my shoulder as I exited the coop, staring up at the darkness with apparent confusion. His instincts said it was approaching morning, but it was still pitch black.

Stolen novel; please report.

I grabbed a few more things and woke up Huo Ten as I got the potatoes, the monkey holding the egg basket for me as I piled up the other ingredients.

Then, it was time to begin. First, the sauce for the beans; that needed tomatoes, vinegar, and a pretty good ketchup I had made, along with the final ingredient that made them taste like baked beans out of a can—The Snow-Phoenix Vine we had gotten from the Cloudy Sword Sect had a strange property when mixed with tomatoes and vinegar.

It tasted rather like worcestershire sauce.

Which was great. I would have to figure that out for real later, but for now it was a fine stopgap.

After that got going well, I started on the sausage. I had brought some meat from Verdant Hill and mixed in Volcano Ginseng and Silver Yin Lotus Root. Both of the bastards had started taking over my fireplace and bathhouse respectively, so I put them to use. Volcano Ginseng provided a burning, fiery kick, while Silver Yin Lotus Root soothed the burning and enhanced the smoky flavours.

Of course, it wasn’t only the meat that got these inclusions. A firmer cheese, fit for frying, had the same herbs within for the vegetarian option.

An hour and a bit later, and the smell started drawing people from their slumbers as plates were piled high with a full English Breakfast. A massive hearty meal to carry us through the day.

Washy certainly seemed quite pleased as we ate our breakfast, or at least in a bit of a better mood.

And then…we got ready. Our little fortress was complete. There wasn’t really any more shoring up of defenses that we needed, or really could, to do.

So I stuck on my Santa hat, Chunky put on his antler, and all of us rode in a giant sleigh towards Hong Yaowu.

I may have been feeling stressed and nervous… but my booming laughter echoed across the village as we approached, the children cheering and clapping.

“Hohohohoho! Happy Solstice, everyone!” I shouted.

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Hong Xian was glad when his daughter and son-in-law appeared like they always did. The booming laughter that cut through the snow heralded their coming. The cheers of the children and of his people answered back as their kin arrived.

It was a truly beautiful sound.

He had been considering that the potential threat would necessitate that they cancel the festivities. It was a very important day for the village…but not enough of one that he would risk his people’s lives for it, but Jin had been adamant. The festival would continue. They would not live in fear, and if a threat did rear its head—Jin promised he would take care of it.

His son-in-law’s words were delivered as if they were a matter of fact, and Xian took strength from that. Hong Yaowu was as protected as it could be.

So instead of worrying, he let himself relax. He actually felt good and fully prepared this time before the dance, rather than having to steel himself for the whole day meditating. He felt energized and ready.

And curious, because Jin, Bowu, and Yao Che had said they would see a real

show.

Xian watched on. Yao Che had been very secretive on what he had worked on with the young man; and now, they were finally going to see what they had commandeered a field for, especially after they laid down those strange rails of iron and wood. It was still about an hour until the dance would begin and the smell of food was heavy in the air—but all was paused for the moment as Bowu gripped the edges of the cloth that was covering his newest creation.

“Is everybody ready?” the young man asked the waiting crowd.

The people of Hong Yaowu cheered.

“Get on with it!” Ty An heckled, and Bowu made a rude gesture in return. Bowu took a deep breath and pulled off the cloth covering.

There was an appreciative gasp as the artifact was revealed. It gleamed like the pure blue sky, and was accented with copper and silver highlights. Its smokestack poked up into the sky, and the name “Azure Express” was emblazoned proudly on the side.

“What is it?” somebody asked, looking on curiously.

“A steam locomotive!” Bowu proudly replied. “We need to work out more things with the pressure of the pill furnace… but this is it. Who wants to have the first ride?” he asked.

Xian, of course, claimed chief’s privilege. He could tell that it was something meant to move, like a steam reaper. But why did it need the tracks? And could it truly carry twenty people? A Steam Reaper trundled along, and even a second person added on slowed it down quite a bit.

The Chief of Hong Yaowu soon got his answer. As soon as they were all aboard the contraption, Bowu flicked a lever. With a groan, and a great puff that sounded rather like Chun Ke when he started to run, the Azure Express started to move.

It sucked in and puffed again as they inched forwards… and then with a third puff the intervals shortened.

A third puff, a fourth puff, a fifth puff, and with each mighty heave they accelerated. At first, to a slow walk. Then, as fast as a Steam Reaper. Then a jog, as the great metal beast pulled itself along the iron rails. It settled at that jog and kept it as it approached the first turn; Jin’s hand on the steam furnace, supplying it with his Qi. However, there was also a bunch of what looked like charcoal near the steam furnace, so it could likely burn that as well.

Xian’s tolerance for astounding things had surely been tested these past years, but even he couldn’t help but marvel at this new thing Bowu had created, chugging along tirelessly around the field.

It made one circuit of the field. And then another, without stopping or slowing.

As he rode it, Xian could imagine rails like this connecting different villages. It might only move as fast as a light jog…but it was a pretty thought.

Ah, what a treat his life had become, to witness such wonders. He was smiling as the contraption finally slowed down and stopped, so that others could try riding the great Azure Express. The ‘Iron Dragon’, as some people were whispering.

It was truly shaping up to be a fine Solstice. He smiled as Hu Li started calling people to dinner.

And that smile quickly faded as Jin suddenly stiffened. A pit opened up in his gut as the once happy cultivators turned grim.

“Contact. Unidentified foes approaching from the northeast,” Jin said, his voice deadly calm. “We’ve found our demons.”